‘HERE IS THE ONE’ By Danstan Wasobokha

Can I let you into a secret? You don’t have to be in a relationship. I mean it.  Yes I know...


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Can I let you into a secret? You don’t have to be in a relationship. I mean it.  Yes I know they force relationships down your throat until you choke on it.

We hear many false narratives: Girls aren’t pretty unless they are wanted. Boys aren’t men unless they’re having an intimate relationships with someone. People aren’t lovable until they are dating someone. But a relationship won’t always make you happy and, as wonderful as romance is, it isn’t the only love that exists.

I have seen friendships that are deeper and more pure than couples who swear it’s forever – and yet the friendship is the one people ignore.

I have heard so often “nobody loves me” out of the mouths of people who are single. And it kills me because if you ask them: where are your parents, your teachers, your classmates, your pets – they say, yes, okay, but it doesn’t count. Of course it counts, love doesn’t diminish just because someone doesn’t want to have sex with you. In fact, doesn’t it sort of make that love more real since they want nothing from you? Not even a date – out of you?

Yes. It is wonderful to be in love. It is magical, I’m sure. But it’s also wonderful to stop for ice cream in your new dress with six other girls. It’s also wonderful to go visit the world with nothing but a bunch of buddies who are really excited about learning. The problem is: we’ve made everything about “The One”. But maybe The One” is just you, loving yourself, having fun, and being happy. Maybe instead of looking for our other half, we should be piecing ourselves together. Maybe I wasn’t born unfinished. Maybe I am the one who makes myself better.  To read more posts by Danstan, click HERE

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