A FEMALE PERSPECTIVE ON COPING WITH PROBLEMS By Mercy Karumba
While I don’t know whether to blame this on personalities or gender differences; it’s easy to note the disparity between how women handle problems and how a man will handle the same issue.
Most women, while going through a crisis, will find it easier to express themselves and actually seek help. Men on the other hand, tend to hide their heads in the sand and actually try to resolve the matter at hand, before reaching out.
A woman can easily break-down in tears in the event of loss, heart-break or even a situation of helplessness or emotional burn-out. A man on the hand, tries to be strong and keep a straight face, no matter how much he is breaking inside. Is this why we often regard women as weak and men as strong? Can this explain why a higher number of men are more susceptible to stress-related diseases and even suicidal thoughts compared to women?
Well, most men have been labelled heroes because they easily overcame or solve a problem without breaking a tear, but many remain so broken inside that their ‘heroism act’ means nothing to them. A woman, on the other hand, will break down, cry out her frustrations and often come out feeling so much better, but look weak externally. It’s also interesting that societal pressure expects a man not to cry, as it’s perceived as not manly enough; whereas a woman is allowed to cry.
How do you cope with your problems? Would you handle it differently were it not for societal pressure? Is it fair? For a male perspective on this, check be sure to check out Mitch’s post below.
A MALE PERSPECTIVE ON Coping With Problems By Mitchell Odhiambo
My wife was telling me the other day that when she went to the mall she saw a few kids with their parents (2 boys aged roughly 7 and 5), and one girl who was about 5/6 years old. They took the same elevator and the girl couldn’t stop talking to the father while the other two boys had their hands in their pockets with dazzled looks on their faces as if they were wondering; why is our sister talking so much? Lol. That is amazing.
Men and women are wired differently in terms of how we cope with issues, challenges or discoveries.
Women will talk it out and feel better. Sometimes though, they talk it out too much for the male species. I remember a time when my sister spoke (I think a thousand words nonstop) and I couldn’t believe it. I just stood there and marvelled. How does a human being do that? Don’t they tire their mandibles?
Men on the other hand, will retreat and seek a solution and then re-emerge with a concrete plan for the way forward. Significantly less words and more action. A number of self-help books have cited this statistic; women utter an average of 20,000 words a day while men speak an average of only 7,000.
The expression of emotions in words overall, helps women to let out emotions that would otherwise remain bottled up. This has been cited as some of the reasons why, women live longer than men. I wonder if it’s true.
My two cents; let men be men and women be women. How do you cope with your problems? Do you agree with me? Let me know below. Until we speak again, I am your host Mitchell Odhiambo. Welcome to a man’s new world.