FEMALE PERSPECTIVE By Lillian Sudi PHYSICAL OR EMOTIONAL INFIDELITY, WHICH IS WORSE?

PHYSICAL OR EMOTIONAL INFIDELITY, WHICH IS WORSE? Statistics prove that more women than men find emotional cheating more painful than...


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PHYSICAL OR EMOTIONAL INFIDELITY, WHICH IS WORSE?

Statistics prove that more women than men find emotional cheating more painful than physical cheating. The obvious reason for this is the fact that the sole foundation of any relationship for a woman, is her emotional attachment to her partner. This does not mean that physical cheating is okay, but that emotional cheating is seemingly equally and often more painful.

Physical cheating is pretty straight forward, emotional cheating however, can be disputed in an argument because what really constitutes emotional cheating? I read somewhere that anything you do with anyone who is currently not your partner (actions which you know your partner will be hurt by), is cheating. This can also be disputed by others who claim that if your partner is sensitive and unreasonable, then she will most likely be hurt by the most trivial of things and therefore that definition cannot stand.

So again, what exactly is emotional cheating?

The truth of the matter is that emotional cheating is quite difficult to nail down. The boundaries are never truly standard because such a relationship can easily be categorized as a friendship.

My definition of emotional cheating states that when an individual is investing their emotional energy on someone other than their partner then they are cheating, more so if they were withholding the same from their partner. In other words, if you can make time for the other party but have difficulty being available to your partner then that is most definitely a breach of the agreement of a relationship. This can be in various forms including something as simple as the frequency of your communication to the other party. Having a regular texting/calling pattern that is not restricted with time (in my book), is equally a form of emotional cheating. The content of the conversation also determines whether one is being unfaithful. If you get the sensation of sharing any major life events with your purported “friend”’ and leave your partner out, then you are being unfaithful. It seems quite trivial to some people but a relationship entails physical and emotional intimacy, a breach of either or both, can often be deemed as foul play. That said, this remains my opinion and so may not be applicable universally.

Since there is no clear cut line on emotional infidelity, the best way to gauge whether or not we are faithful,  is by analyzing how we ourselves, want to be treated i.e would I be okay if my partner behaved the way same way that I am? If I receive texts at night, delete messages and have secret dates with my purported “friend” then I should be okay with my partner receiving texts in the middle of the night, deleting messages and hiding secret dates with their “friend” as well.

What’s your take? To get a male perspective on this, CLICK HERE to read my colleague Mitch’s post in this Blog.

 

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