FEMALE PERSPECTIVE By Lillian Sudi – Love is not for the faint hearted

Love is not for the faint hearted  I know of a couple that wed in holy matrimony, they had a big wedding...

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Love is not for the faint hearted

 I know of a couple that wed in holy matrimony, they had a big wedding and invited the most prominent people. Fast forward five years later and the woman is bedridden, a state she has been stuck in for three years. That is more than half her time in marriage. Different people have different versions of the story but what remains true is that the woman entered into severe depression and lost her mind, with time suffered a stroke and the rest as they say is history.

Later on we found out that the man knew he had infected her with HIV and left her ailing at home without ever informing her of it. She started getting sick, got tested and it turned out, she was HIV positive. That was the genesis of her health complications and mental breakdown. The man has since married another woman, he appears fattened and full of life, funny how life sometimes keeps rewarding the villain.

Anyone would wonder how anyone can live with themselves after ruining the life of another but nowadays most of us lack the most basic human instinct, love! Animals have been found to love their own more than human beings stand up for their fellow human beings.

Love or lack of is a scary thing. The greatest crimes have been committed in the name of love, be it love of religion, love for ourselves, radical religious views and money eat up the love we should have for each other and the values that come with it. We are capable of being our best and worst selves, capable of hurting anyone, doing anything and breaking the law accordingly, all in the name of love, sometimes love misplaced.

Love is a costly endeavor and nowadays a huge number of people in our generation have decided to do away with it all together. We have developed affection for the things that matter less, items that we can replace and as a result, stripped off our love for each other as a defense mechanism. Relationships are seen to be less stressful without love, that’s why everyone seems to be entering into casual relationships first before they decide whether they actually love each other.

Even towards our families, some of us seem relentless in our quest for family property and have no problem fighting to kill each other for money or property. Men beat their wives, pay for their mistresses’ upkeep and claim to have no money at home, without any regard for their own children. Young fathers have an easy time running away from their responsibility leaving their children fatherless.

Who can blame them? With all that goes into loving someone, it is easier to just forgo the entire process altogether. Love comes with so much heartache, so much pain and a unique sense of commitment that brings about long suffering. But to love is to be vulnerable, to lay yourself bare in front of the one you set yourself to love, be it your child,  your parent, your spouse or friend. It is to know that this person might hurt you but also believing in your strength and will to pick up the pieces and move on. Contrary to common beliefs, love is not for the faint hearted because only the strong are capable of taking it on head on.

 Wishing you all, a good weekend as you ponder about what love really means. From Sudi. To get a male perspective on this topic, click HERE to read my colleague Mitchell’s post on this Facebook page. 

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