On why most women are Commitment-Genic
For reasons I fail to understand, men are often dodgy when it comes to commitment while women always insist on defining the relationship. This makes even less sense when you logically look at it because a man gains more by defining the relationship than a woman does. You only need to look at the before and after marriage pictures of couples to affirm this.
I came across a phrase some years back that read ‘Sex is the price women pay for marriage. Marriage is the price men pay for sex’ which implied men love sex, women love commitment. So what exactly is it about getting a title from a man that makes women so darn restless and willing to go out of their comfort zones for? And why do men hardly ever care much about making things official? Well simply put; this is because, for a woman, defining the relationship is a declaration to the world that a man regards her as ‘special’ and intends to have a monogamous relationship with her. This feeling of being ‘special’ has a dramatic effect on the chemical action in a woman’s brain which is evidenced by research showing that a woman’s satisfaction rate is four to five times higher in a marital bed and two to three times higher in a monogamous relationship. That is something I read a while back.
So the relationship is the ultimate price for a woman, for the unfortunate few it might be a pathetic relationship but the fact that she feels secure and stable is why she will still insist on getting a title. And it is quite frustrating knowing that a man fails to envision how good that particular relationship is for him, how much the woman is willing to bend over backwards for him and to the contrary, he tends to start thinking about all the chances he will miss with other women by committing to her.
A man often forgets how hard it was for him when he was single. A married man or one in a long-term relationship is always secretly worried that single men are having more fun. He imagines wild singles parties, adventurous, commitment-free coupling and Jacuzzis full of naked supermodels. He fears opportunity is passing right by him, and he’s missing out completely. It doesn’t matter that, when he was single, he could hardly get a girl to glance at him and forgets how he spent most of his nights alone because suddenly, when the opportunity comes for him to have a permanent arrangement, he tends to be unsure and dodgy. This generally leaves women confused, desperate and frustrated.
At the end of the day, women want to be in a relationship and the plain feeling of knowing they have a partner is all that matters. It is not uncommon to hear mothers ask their daughters in their mid twenties when they are bringing home someone because women are raised with the ultimate goal of getting married and raising their own families. Men are raised to focus on amassing wealth. A woman might get a million advances at a time, but women are naturally monogamous, and once they believe they have found a suitable mate, they want to stop looking and stick to that particular one. A woman doesn’t want variety rather, she wants consistency and security. Therefore, she is more likely to want a title to affirm her position. This is just my own personal opinion and might not necessarily apply in all cases. There is a new breed of women slowly breaking away from the norm.
To get a male perspective, please click link to read my colleague Mitchell’s views – http://goo.gl/U66Qdm