I have been thinking a lot about what it means to share my work with others. What it means to write from my heart. See, often I will write about what I believe is safe, what I think will resonate with people. Everyone has some sort of art. In a way each of us is talented and can create. The thing with art is, it originates from our souls, the deepest part of our hearts. Art is our way of displaying a little part of ourselves. Artists draw according to what they are feeling, musicians sing about what they feel and writers write about things that resonate with them. Art is the universe’s way of listening to us when we are all alone. It therefore only makes sense that sharing our art is scary.
Every Wednesday, I sit down for a couple of hours and think about what I want to write about. Often I will think about the things that have happened to me over the week. Sometimes these things are not pretty. Those days, I feel myself getting into trouble. See, it’s easy to talk about happy things. It’s easy to tell stories of glamour and happy endings. However, stories of pain, defeat, humiliation and pain, those are hard to tell. It’s hard to stand up and bare my soul to people I have not met. It’s hard to tell them that not every story ends with a happy ending. It’s hard to show them my erring ways. When I thought further on this, I realized it’s because I worry you my readers may not appreciate this art. You may not resonate with it. See, if you don’t resonate with something that is censored, I could easily hide behind the excuse that I held back. I could multiply the recognition by whatever factor I feel makes me happier, tell myself that I would have done better if I had spoken from the heart. However, when I write from the heart, then the big guns come out to play.
Often, we associate our worth to our success. Every Friday, I associate how successful my week has been by the number of views this post gets. If it is successful, I feel accomplished. I feel like I am worthwhile. If it is not however, I will beat myself up. I will tell myself that I am no good a writer and I should probably just give up and close up. I tell myself that I probably am embarrassing myself. However, when I think about it, my writing is not who I am. If it’s dismissed, it does not mean I am a dismal person. It just means I am an amazing writer who has just not leveraged her skills. It tells me I need to figure out how to do better. See, the thing about attaching yourself to your work, it suggests you have to do a total overhaul on who you are as a person. It does not allow you a chance to compartmentalize and decide what you need to work on. It implies that you can never be a good artist unless you are a whole other different person.
A while ago, I wrote an amazing article about what I think my funeral would be like. it was a post on self-reflection It was an amazing piece that gave me goosebumps when I went through it. I gave it to my friend who was blown away by it. He asked me to share it with my colleagues. This idea scared me to bits. The thought of people I have to see every day looking at my work without me looking over their shoulder and explaining myself was unfathomable. However, as I thought about it recently I realized I was actually worried about what their rejection would do to me. What if this thing that I thought was my best work fell short. Would I ever be able to write again? However, when I think about it, this is what it means to dare greatly. It’s when you are faced by so much doubt yet take the plunge anyway. It’s when you realize your worth is not determined by how good art you can produce. It’s when you realize you can fail yet remain a valuable member of the team. It’s when you realize you have much more to offer than success. It’s when you realize you are not a product dispensing machine but a valuable and wholesome being.
You see that jewelry that sits on your dresser, that one you custom made and are scared people will not love, show it to people with pride. That song you wrote and read every night before you sleep, share it with a friend. That portrait you drew, display it in the middle of your living room. Share that part of your soul with the world. Let them see how beautiful it is inside your mind. Dare greatly!