You sit behind your screen most days, lurking in the darkness, behind your safe veneer that is anonymity. You lurk in the shadows, looking at people’s lives. It hurts you to see people putting themselves out there, you wish you could do the same. You wish you had an identity outside of your screen name, you wish people knew who you are. However, you have long allowed the digital you to overtake the human you. So you sit and stew in the hand that fate has dealt you. You wish things were different, sometimes you want things to change on good days, you want to get up and change things. That day however is not today, instead you choose to take one last long leisurely drive down the road of internet bullying.
You come upon a young woman, she has been documenting her weightless journey. She looks amazing to be honest. You look down at your growing pouch. For years now you have been promising yourself to do something about it. You hate this happy soul, you hate her smile that is filled with satisfaction. You look at her and imagine she is taunting you for being a failure. You decide to lash back, behind your shiny screen name, you go all out. You tear her down. You tell her that she looks ridiculous now that she has lost weight. You tell her you liked her better when she was bigger. When you are done you hit the enter button and for a split second sit and stew in your satisfaction. This however does not last, you are like an addict, you are jonesing for your next fix.
You drive on and come across a young man. He has been documenting his journey on beating his addiction. Today, he has done a video on how he is channeling his energy into different things such as volunteering in children’s homes. There is an adorable picture where he is cuddling a young baby. You look at that image and feel hate rising from your throat. He looks happy, how dare he be happy when he is a dirty addict. Addicts are supposed to be unhappy. People like you, decent people who have lived clean lives should have monopoly on happiness. You decide to put him in his place. You go on to tell him that this is just temporary. You tell him the moment he is alone, he will relapse. An addict is always an addict. You then sit back and momentarily stew in your satisfaction.
Internet bully, we are on to you. We know you are not happy. We know you are not a big shot. We are aware of your pain, the cat’s out of the bag. You can no longer hurt us with your bile. We choose not to fight your pain with anger. We choose to cover you with love and hope you get the courage to step behind the ugly shadow of your screen name. You can come out into the open, their is enough life for everyone. You don’t have to be miserable. Step out into the sunlight and let the sun thaw out the cold that has settled into your heart. Channel all that creativity in to creating positivity and you will be a happier person. Internet bully, live a little. To read more posts by Angela, click HERE