WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR – IS IT REALISTIC? By Mercy Karumba

In our search for the best, we often lay down high expectations for almost everything and everyone that comes our way. Sometimes we even...


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In our search for the best, we often lay down high expectations for almost everything and everyone that comes our way. Sometimes we even swear that we will never settle for less. The question is, could it be that we are often being a little too unrealistic? This one mostly affects our choice of a soulmate.

Remember as a teenager how we would describe the kind of spouse we would marry? Some of these descriptions were inspired by either books, movies or even fantasies we had. The older we grow, the closer to reality we have become. However, sadly some of us may still be stuck with some fantasies that continue to pull us back from being in the present.

I am not saying you shouldn’t know what you are looking for or that you stoop too low. No way. In fact, this is good because it means that you won’t fall for each person that comes your way. What I am saying i; your choice(s) should be as close to reality as much as possible.

Are you still blinded by Beauty and the Beast, Cinderella and Snow White stories? Please get back! Snow White and Cinderella do not exist and neither does Prince Charming to take you in shining armour. This makes me wonder, why don’t we fantasise about the beast in the story? (lol) Perhaps I should do a research on that.

Sometimes it’s not really the fairy tales that blind us but rather, very high expectations of our spouses. You expect him or her to be perfect enough to deserve you. This may result in you jumping from one relationship to another or being single and unhappy. Everyone comes as a messy package, it’s up to both of you to cultivate the relationship you both want and get the best out of each other.

Relax and evaluate your expectations, make sure taht what you are looking for is closer to reality as much as possible. To get a male perspective on this, click HERE to read my colleague Mitch’s views.

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